This is the Time

This entry from 9 and a half years ago really stood out this morning for some reason.  I don’t know why, but maybe it’s because I’m in the same position now like I was back then, except I definitely don’t sleep until 5pm.  I must have been on some nice drugs back in 2006 to sleep that late.  It’s interesting to go back and read something from 9 years ago and still relate to 85% of it.    I’ve been mulling over a career change to sales, and I haven’t really decided what to do, then I read the line where I say “I couldn’t hack it as a salesman,” and I think to myself….maybe that’s the answer I sent to myself in the future, from a time in the past where I was wise beyond my years.  Maybe I had a life almanac, like Marty McFly had a Sports Almanac.  Maybe not, but it’s still a fun read to enjoy on this Throwback Thursday.

Originally posted: May 6th, 2006 on:*starduster

You won’t find me trading secrets or buying back anyone’s trust. I’ll never play professional sports unless I invent a game where your rookie year starts at thirty-one. I won’t be available all the time for anyone but myself, and to me that is much more healthy than being everything to anyone.

You won’t find me on any pedestal for too long and you might not want to be there when & if I jump back down to earth. I rarely talk on the phone because I feel it’s impersonal to speak to someone while you’re doing ten other things at once and most of the time when I am on the phone, I’m thinking about all the other things I have to get done.

I’m thinking right now would be a great time to break out of this mindset that has been keeping me in my place. I couldn’t hack it as a salesman, a video store clerk, an office worker or a delivery guy, so I chose to hang out behind a bar and talk to drunk people for six hours at a time.

There are times when I don’t want to get out of bed in the morning, but then I realize that it’s really the late afternoon and I should have gotten up hours before the 5:00 news. I don’t search for people, and I never go out looking for love, but somehow everyone I’m meant to meet shows up in my life practically unannounced. I never plan on anything to happen, so when it does I’m always quietly surprised and somewhat satisfied.

I don’t always know what I want, but I do have an understanding of what I don’t want and that makes it easier for me to get what I deserve. I’m not a prophet, but I can tell you a good story, and I’m rarely a role model unless you consider following your heart good advice.

This is the time when I choose to feel a certain way and stop allowing other people to make me feel anything. I cried for the first time in a year recently, and for the most part, I felt a lot better.

I’m never disappointed with anything in life, because I know I’m the creator of my experience here and at some level, everything that goes around in this world comes back to me at 40, or 50, or 60, or 70 with an amazing story to tell, or just a good blog that keeps me inspired.

2 thoughts on “This is the Time

  1. I enjoy going back to old journal entries and marvel at the frame of mind and heart I was in when I wrote it. Life is a series of cycles. And most of them repeat. That doesn’t mean that we can’t chase the dreams and goals that have eluded is in previous cycles.

    Nice post. Ahem, repost.

    Liked by 1 person

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